I’ve mentioned that I’m very bad at golf. Once, I really sliced a tee off. The ball sailed into a farmers property, into the chicken coop. He was angry, so I went through the trees to talk to him. He said, “You killed my best hen!!” I said,”I’m so sorry! Can I replace her?” He … More You Can’t Have My Kid!!!
I asked my friend Jake, who is an avid diver, why the divers always fall backwards into the water. He said, “Dummy, if they fell forward they’d still be in the boat.” Um, oh yeah. I should have figured that one out myself. The problem is, I still don’t know the real answer. When you … More Don’t Fall Forward!!!!
A man was working on a dryer, when it exploded. As the blast was propelling him upward, he saw a man falling down. He yelled at the guy, “Hey! Do you know anything about gas dryers??” The guy said, “No! Do you know anything about parachutes??” … More The Thing Blew Up!!