I received a call yesterday. The guy identified himself only as a ‘Government Agent’. I said, “I know.” He said, “How could you possibly know?” I said, “This phone has no sim card, no battery, and it’s broken.” Little guy 1, The Man 0. I wonder how many ways we are under surveillance by the … More Stop Harassing Me!!!!
I have ten thousand pairs of special glasses to protect your eyes during today’s eclipse. They’re free. Its really not that generous because I give them out each Spring and Summer to anyone who is going to be around me while I’m wearing shorts. One unprotected glance can cause eye damage worse than the eclipse. … More Who Turned Out The Lights???
The crackdown on the release of classified information is really getting tough. Yesterday a guy in the NSA was charged with treason when he told a coworker that he needed to take a leak. I do hope that the people who have committed felonies and perhaps treason are prosecuted and sentenced appropriately. These people did … More More Leaks!!
I’m not afraid of the dark, specifically. To be more precise, I’m afraid of dark colored cars. I’m sure they’re spying on me all of the time. Even my neighbor just bought a black Cadillac and keeps it in the garage. I still think he’s up to no good. I think I’ll sell it on … More I’m Afraid of The Dark!!!!
Someone named “CIA” just started following me on Facebook, Twitter, my blog and Pinterest. Sweet! I’m on fire! … More I’m On Fire!!
Someone named “CIA” just started following me on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. Sweet! I’m on fire! … More Unwanted Follower!
If the eyes are truly the windows to the soul, I’m going to put blinds on them. I don’t need people looking in there. … More Windows to the Soul!
I’ve heard people say, “Don’t get your nose out of joint”, which makes me wonder if some people get arthritis in their nose. … More Arthritis in Your Nose??
In my mind, Fruit Loops sound like the happiest of all circular shaped cereals. … More Breakfast!
Every time my wife asks me who I’m talking to on the phone, texting, emailing, etc., I always tell her it’s Jake, from State Farm. … More Suspicious Minds!