Since the news broke about a McDonald’s hamburger bought 20 years￼ ago and looking exactly the same as it did when it was purchased, I have decided I will only eat those burgers. I will live forever!￼ McDonald’s vehemently denies that the burger could ever look like a fresh one. What else could they say? … More 20-year-old burger???
It’s snowing here, so the floor was kind of slippery at McDonald’s. Of course I was the one who slipped and fell. I hurt my knee, back, neck and leg. I thought about suing, but they offered me a free breakfast sandwich every week for a year! Score! I love McDonald’s breakfast. I really don’t … More I’m Pretty Sure I’m McStupid!!!
I was at a coffee shop recently and asked an employee what the wifi password was. She said “You have to buy a drink first.” I said, “OK, I’ll take a pumpkin spice latte.” After I paid for the drink I asked “Now what is the password?” She said “It’s ‘You have to buy a … More I Can’t Remember The Password!!
We took Heather’s Mom to brunch. It was magical and by that I mean they had a guy doing table magic. I asked him how he did a trick and he said, “I could tell you but I would have to kidnap you, never to return.” I said, “I understand. Could you tell my Mother-in-law?” … More I’ve Been Kidnapped!!!
During a job interview, the interviewer told me that this position really needs a very responsible person. I said, “I’m your man! At every job I’ve had, when ever there was a major problem they said I was responsible.” She was not amused. I think a good sense of humor should never be overlooked in … More You’re Fired.. Hired.. Get Out!!
Every time I’m tempted to eat a cheeseburger I hear two voices. One says “Eat the cheeseburger.” The other one says “You heard him, eat the cheeseburger!” It is virtually impossible for me to resist a really good cheeseburger. Who am I kidding, it doesn’t even really have to be that good. Within a five … More I’m So Weak!!!
I saw a cashier at a Starbucks spill coffee all over their computer. The angry manager cleaned up the coffee and was turning the computer back on. The cashier said, “Please let it work. Please let it work!” A barista walked by and said, “It should be faster than ever. That was a double shot … More Coffee Bytes!!!!