She’s Drunk!!!

My daughter put a tooth under her pillow anxiously to see how much she would get. I forgot all about it. She came to me and said "The Tooth Fairy forgot!" Yikes! I hid a $5 bill in the medicine cabinet and explained that sometimes The Tooth Fairy gets drunk and forgets where she's supposed … More She’s Drunk!!!

Kids Are Brilliant!!!

My daughter and her husband are having difficulty keeping their boys from running into the parking lot. So they put up a gate. Steve was working on the outside of the gate and dropped a screw. “Don’t worry, Daddy”, Isaac said, “I’ll get it for you”. He crawled under the gate and got the screw.  … More Kids Are Brilliant!!!

You’re drunk!!!

At a dinner party, a little girl kept staring at a man at the table. He finally asked her why she was staring at him. She said, “Mommy and Daddy said you drink like a fish so I was just waiting to see how you do it.” Wanna get away? Kids can be brutally honest. … More You’re drunk!!!

Goodbye, Friends!

I wonder what Facebook employees do to waste their time at work? It’s time to seriously clean out my facebook friends. There are so many that I either don’t know or which I have no common friends. As a result, I don’t see posts from my true friends. Time to wipe ’em out! I don’t … More Goodbye, Friends!

You are insane!!

Three men were at a bar. One said, “My wife was reading a ‘Tale of Two Cities’ and she gave birth to twins!” “That’s funny,” another man said, “My wife was reading ‘The Three Musketeers’ and she gave birth to triplets!” The third man shouted, “I have to get home! “When I left, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves!!!” … More You are insane!!

Today is Tuesday. No, it’s Friday. What Day is it??

My grandparents and another couple got together often. One day, the other guy started talking about a great restaurant they went to. Gramps said, “Really? What’s it called?” The guy couldn’t remember. He asked, “What are those good smelling flowers called again?” “Do you mean a rose?”, Gramps asked. “Yes that’s it,” he said. The guy looked at his wife said, “Rose, what’s that restaurant we went to the other night?” … More Today is Tuesday. No, it’s Friday. What Day is it??