I think I would rather be a baseball bat than a piñata, because the piñata gets hit pretty hard. When my kids were little, I only bought one piñata for their birthday parties. I don’t mean one for each party, I mean only one ever. Each time a blindfolded kid took a whack at it, … More Stop The Beatings!!!
Yesterday was a weird day. I decided I would do whatever was on my mind without thought of consequence. So I stole a white duck, a Rolls-Royce convertible (I kicked the sales guy out the door and took off) There’s more. A lot more… I even let the duck drive. Some people say they can’t, … More Was It Just A Dream??? A Nightmare???
I wonder if people in prison celebrate Independence Day. I think the whole incarceration thing would probably squash the enthusiasm for celebrating the thankfulness for freedom. Maybe they could get red white and blue Jell-O instead of the horrid fruit cup. I’m really not trying to make light of the inmates conditions or the fact … More Independence Day? Are You Nuts???
When I was in elementary school, my teacher asked me “Jerry, if you have five dollars and you ask your Dad for five more, how many would you have?” I said “Five.” She said, “You don’t know addition very well.” I said, “You don’t know my Dad very well.” Parents need to be frugal for … More
I was talking to my friend about crazy things that we and people we know have done. My friend said, “My uncle tried to make a new kind of car. He took the wheels from a Cadillac, the grill from a Rolls-Royce, and tires from a Mercedes.” I asked, “What did he get?” He said, … More Stop!!! Thief!!!
I’m pretty sure its illegal to drive your car on someone else’s lawn. In fact, I’m really sure. At least the bail wasn’t very much. I remember seeing deep tire tracks on someone’s lawn and wondering what the heck happened. Was it a really bad and expensive prank or maybe someone parks their car on … More Get Off My Land!!!
Wow. Yesterday I locked myself inside the car with no air conditioner on. It was so hot. In no time, I was feeling very sleepy. I'm sure happy that cop came to the window and told me to get out of the car. They say that if I take my meds I can go home … More It’s Hot In Here!!!