I Can’t Think!!!

As a potential jurist, I was being questioned by one of the attorneys. The exchange went like this: “Own your home?” “Yes” “Married?” “Yes” “How long?” “20 years” “Do you have strong opinions and freely express them?” “Not in 20 years” I don’t know too many married men who express their feelings honestly and openly. … More I Can’t Think!!!

Contempt of Court!!

When I went to court to get a divorce, the judge asked me what the problem was. I said, “Your honor, in our seven months together we haven’t agreed on one single thing”. The judge asked my wife the same question. She said, “It’s been eight months”. If you’ve ever lived with someone who you … More Contempt of Court!!

Revolt!!

We saw “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes”last year. Good movie, but I’m kind of tired of the ape thing. How about “Rise of the Planet of the Men”, where we refuse to hold our woman’s purse while she tries on clothes? Now, there’s your flick. Come on, now. Enough with the talking animals. … More Revolt!!

The Town Hooker

A church bulletin: Weight Watchers meeting at 7 PM. Please use large double door at the side entrance. People obviously make mistakes, but none as scrutinized as those printed in a church bulletin. Secretaries proof read the bulletins, but it’s not a fool proof system. The spoken word can get just as messy. One day, … More The Town Hooker