I was cooking dinner and the smoke alarm went off. I went to find my kids and they were washing their hands. I said, “Didn’t you hear that noise?” My daughter said, “Yes. It was the smoke detector. It means dinner is ready.” Well what should I expect from a comedian’s kids? All of my … More Fire!!!
I asked my grandson if he knew where we lived. He said, “At the airport. When we want you, we go get you. Then, when we’re done with your visit, we take you back to the airport”. Sound logic. A child’s perspective is so interesting. When you travel across the country, it seems like you’re … More I Love Our Grandkids!!
When my daughter, Sarah was little and sitting in her high chair, she was twisting and moving all over the place. My wife said to me, “Straighten her up.” I said, “Sarah, what are you doing with your life? Do you want to be this way forever? It’s time to grow up.” My wife didn’t … More Grow Up!!!
I’m old. The other day I was walking past a cemetery and three guys started chasing me with shovels! ~Rodney Dangerfield Its hard to wrap my head around the fact that I’ll be 60 years old in just a few weeks. I know, many people tell me to just embrace it. EMBRACE IT?? Are they … More 60?? Really??
I think Father’s Day is sort of an afterthought. “Well, I guess we should do something for the guy. He’s been hanging around for a while…” … More Happy Father’s Day – I Guess…
People are living longer as time passes. This is not a good thing. The problem is that the maladys that plague the elderly haven’t moved. So, we can count on 10 extra years of soft food, diapers and not being able to hold a conversation because we can’t remember a thing. … More I Hope I Croak Before 90!!!