We were celebrating our friends’ four year old’s birthday. We totally spaced a gift, so we got an envelope and put a $10 bill in it. When he opened it, he ran right to me and gave me a hug. I asked, “How did you know it was from us?” He said “That was easy. … More Kids Are Brutal!!!
My wife and I were discussing who would portray our characters if a movie was ever made about our lives. I said George Clooney. She said, “In that case, I’ll play myself”. I think a lot of people play that game. We try to pick the best, albeit grossly exaggerated, star. I don’t want to … More George Clooney?? Not Fair!!
I don’t think I’m cut out to be working on Mars. A four year commute? And that’s without traffic! We watched “The Martian” last night. I really enjoyed the film. It was well scripted, had a believable set design and the acting was terrific. The only thing missing was Tom Hanks. This … More The Martian???
I’ve been married so many often, I keep an attorney and a minister on retainer at all times. … More Married – Again??
Last year, we were burglarized in the middle of the night and never heard a thing. The guy was caught the next day and I told the cop I wanted to talk to the guy. “I need to know how he got in the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying that for years!” … More Take My Wife, Please!