I love this time of year because you can have backyard fires. They are so much fun and so relaxing. I just love them. Not so much this year. We are having record heat and at 9 o’clock at night it’s still in the 90s and these are red flag warning days which means you … More I’m On Fire!!!
These days I sign all important documents with an EpiPen. At my age, most documents I sign have something to do with my ultimate demise and my EpiPen package says it can save my life. Thank you, EpiPen. EpiPens are really strange looking gadgets. I’m supposed to take one with me wherever I go. The … More Give Me Back My Pen!!!
I got into an altercation with an extremely obnoxious man who refused to move away from me, despite repeat requests to do so. I even punched the guy. In jail, my lawyer explained that my behavior was way out of line on a plane. Some people are far too honest. You know them. Proud to … More I’m Better Than You!!!!
Today is National Siblings Day here in the US, which strikes me as odd. I’m going to celebrate the people who were always trying to inflict as much pain (in a fun way and I participated) as possible? Seems weird to me. I really do love them all deeply. We had a lot of fun … More They Are The Best!!!
Its terrible that ALL women will not be able to celebrate the day. Instead, they will be mistreated and oppressed. Shame. If you are blessed to be able to celebrate this day, I hope we all be sure to give thanks and pray for all of the women who are unable to. My heart goes … More International Womens Day!!
I think if you get a charlie horse, you should be able to stop it just by yelling “Whoa”. Charlie horses are the worst. There is absolutely no warning at all. They can and will strike at the worst possible moments. You’re sound asleep in your nice warm bed and wham! Charlie got you. Many … More My Horse Is Killing Me!!!
A lady was looking through all of the turkeys at the grocery store but couldn’t find one large enough to suit her needs. She asked the clerk, “Excuse me, do these turkeys get any bigger?” The clerk said, “No ma’am, they’re dead.” So many years ago, as the pilgrims sat down to eat with … More What?? No Football????
I like the Miami Dolphins. I know what you’re thinking. They haven’t been to the Super bowl since 1984.You couldn’t be more wrong. They’ve been involved in every Super Bowl since then. They watched it on TV. The timing seems a little odd to me. Just when fans are gearing up for NFL football to … More Right at Football Season? Are You Kidding Me???
March Madness is something completely different for me. It’s the memory of two March marriages. Now that’s March Madness, my friends. … More March Madness!!
A friend won a ticket to the Super Bowl. It was in a terrible seat. He saw an empty seat at the 50 yard line and took it. The guy sitting next to him said this was the first Super Bowl that his wife missed since 1968. My buddy asked why he didn’t give the ticket to a family member. The guy said, “They’re at her funeral.” … More Super Bowl!