When my daughter handed my my 60th birthday card, I looked at her lovingly and said, “Thank you, Cupcake, but just one card would have been fine.” Like most people, I’m astonished at the rate that I’m aging. I’m going to turn 63 in just a couple of months. I know! Everyone tells me that … More I Don’t Need That Many!!!
When I was a teenager, I worked for a time in the logging industry. I needed a job badly. I told the foreman I needed a job and I was pretty good. He told me to chop down a tree, which I did with ease. He hired me on the spot. He wanted to know … More Timber!!!
While studying geology one day, the teacher was showing us how to read a map. After explaining latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes she asked, “If I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude . . .?” After a long silence, I … More Eat Lunch Where??
I worked for the Air Force. My first day, I tried to impress an Airman who started walking into my office. I picked up the the phone and said, “Yes, General, I’ll have it completed this afternoon. Thank you, sir, and the best to your family as well.” I asked the Airman what I could do for him. He said, “Nothing, really, I’m just here to hook up your phone.” … More Who’s Calling??
A preacher noticed a little boy trying to ring the doorbell but it was just out of his reach. The Rev walks over to help the boy. After he pressed the doorbell, he asked’ “Now what?” The boy turned and shouted, “NOW WE RUN!!” … More Are You Insane??