I saw my therapist a few days ago. She scolded me for missing my last two appointments because my condition is serious. I said, “I know, but I was just doing what you told me.” She said, “I haven’t told you to skip appointments!” I said,”No, but you told me to avoid people who irritate … More You Make Me Crazy!!!
Yesterday I found a $20 bill in the parking lot at my doctor’s office. I took it inside and gave it to the person behind the desk. When I saw the doctor, he told me I have scruples. I knew it! probably got it from handling the money. I wonder how many people are turning … More Noooooooo!! I Have What????
Last week I told Heather I needed to go to the doctor’s office. She asked, “Which doctor?” I said “No, just our family doctor.” I’m not sure what a witch doctor does. Do they only treat witches? Do witches even have health insurance? Glinda Care? I don’t think they make enough cash to pay for … More I Need To See A Witch Doctor!!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Therefore applesauce everyday should keep all drunk doctors away. Typically, you wouldn’t think a physician would come to work after a bender but the odds are some of them do and I think they’re all mine. I know! It took a host of the best doctors in … More You’re Drunk!!!
I went to see my doctor because I had a sore throat. He asked what was wrong but I could barely talk. He demanded that I speak louder. I said, “I’m sorry, I’m a little hoarse.” He said, “Sorry to be the one to break it to you but the resemblance doesn’t stop there.” The … More You’re A Jerk!!!
A couple of days ago we killed a black widow spider on our front porch. I hate black widows. Does that mean I'm racist? I know some people are offended when you kill anything but under certain circumstances I would call them out. For example, if a rattlesnake "looked" like it was going to strike … More Am I a Racist???
I had a doctor appointment and just before leaving, I remembered the old phrase “An apple a day keeps the doctor away.” So I brought an apple. He was just about to give me an injection when I beaned him like a hard throwing MLB pitcher. He dropped like a rock and it must be … More I Think I Killed My Doctor!!!