My wife is trying to impeach me because I failed to clean the kitchen on Saturday. I’m worried that she has enough votes because she has swayed the opinions of the dogs￼. I don’t even think there are articles of impeachment in place in our home, but there’s no doubt who the speaker of the … More I’ve been impeached!!!
The best day of the week for me is Wednesday because I can always count on the camel to remind me that it’s hump day. Even if you’re in a bad mood because you still have to work two more days in the week, it’s awfully hard to remain in a bad mood when there’s … More It’s hump day
I think Abraham Lincoln was a show off. His Gettysburg Address was proof. “Four score and seven years ago …” He could have just said “87 years ago…” But no, he had to get all fancy. I have given many speeches but not even one of them has become famous. That’s just not right. Granted, … More I need a famous speech!
If I hear one more weather person using the terms juicy and toasty, I’m going to go insane. Most of you already know that ship has sailed but if it’s possible to go even more insane, the meteorologists will push me over the ledge. ￼￼￼ I know it’s trivial and I don’t have to watch … More It’s not juicy!!!
I’m curious, if you take a gingerbread house from the store without paying for it can they foreclose on it? I’m asking for a friend.￼ Last night we had two of our God children over for dinner and making gingerbread houses. I was wondering how fun that might be, since I had never made one … More My house is in foreclosure!!
Like many others I watch a great deal of true crime shows. And in almost every case there’s somebody who says the prime suspect couldn’t have done it because he didn’t have a mean bone in his body.￼ I have one, it’s the little pinky toe on my right foot. That dude is furious. ￼ … More These bones are mean!!!
The last time we checked into a hotel, the desk clerk asked us if we wanted smoking or non-smoking. Fair question. I said smoking. Then she went on a rant about how horrible it is for your health and well-being. She had no idea that I wasn’t talking about cigarettes. I brought along my new … More I’m Not A Smoker!!