My 10 year old grandson, Boaz, told my son, Eric, that he wanted a cell phone. Eric asked him why. Boaz said he wanted to be able to take pictures. Eric said, “I’ll get you a camera instead.” Boaz asked,”What’s a camera?” Yikes! We don’t think of those things until they happen. This younger generation … More Watch the birdie!!
I’m allergic to alligators. I’m pretty sure that even one bite would probably kill me. People who suffer from food allergies beware! Yesterday my wife and I were about to watch a football game. We decided we needed some ‘football food’ so I ordered from a local restaurant. We ordered two mini cheese burgers, southwest … More I have allergies!!
I think I would rather be a baseball bat than a piñata, because the piñata gets hit pretty hard. When my kids were little, I only bought one piñata for their birthday parties. I don’t mean one for each party, I mean only one ever. Each time a blindfolded kid took a whack at it, … More Stop beating me!!
I hate the word ‘narcissist’ because I didn’t create it myself. I think a real narcissist is difficult to be around because they’re always thinking of themselves and nobody else. I like to hang out with those who always think of ME first and not themselves. I know! It’s not like I’m selfish or anything, … More Me, a narcissist???
I love to sing and really belt it out. My neighbors love it too because they keep pounding on the walls when I do, which I’m convinced is a call for an encore. They even had some police officers come over to listen. I can sing. Heck, almost everyone can sing. I’m not sure we … More The next American idol!
When my kids were little, I heard my daughter, Sarah scream in pain. I found my son, Eric pulling her hair. I told her he didn’t know it would hurt. I heard another scream, came back and my daughter said, “He knows now”. Why little kids do things like that is a mystery. I guess … More Don’t pull my hair!!
I have the perfect solution to keep your older car running well. Once a month, go look at the prices of new ones. I don’t know about you, but the new car smell always seems to fade quickly as soon as I make my first exorbitant monthly payment. I’ll never buy a brand new car … More I can’t afford this!!
When my kids were little, we were leaving Disneyland. My daughter waved and said, “Bye bye, Goofy.” My son waved and said, “Bye bye, Pluto.” I waved and said, “Bye bye, money.” I honestly have no idea how a family can afford to go to any of the Disney properties. Seriously, it’s crazy expensive. I … More I am broke!!!
I used to believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. As I grow older, I believe exclusively in the Tooth Fairy. She’s the only one that makes sense. There’s no way I can believe in a jolly old elf that can make his way to every house, hut and shelter around the globe in … More I’m not sure what I believe!!
Our fireplace is really just a space heater with phoney fire, but at least it looks fake. Not everyone can say that. Fake fireplaces, fake Christmas trees, fake wreaths, candles to make it smell like a wax forest in our homes. Even fake snow so the ski resorts can open early and stay open longer. … More You mean it’s all fake???