Grease Those Wheels!!!

I’ve heard so many people use the phrase, “I greased the wheels a little bit.” So they are referring to giving somebody some money for special treatment. I think this is stupid. They say the squeaky wheel gets the grease, so I think that means you should just make tons of noise and be obnoxious just like the guy  Mayham on those insurance commercials.

I think if I ever did that I would cover the money with grease first. I may never get in the place to eat or what have you however it would certainly be a lot of fun for me and other people who are also waiting. I would slip it into the handshake because men usually wipe their hands on their pants. The joke would go on and on and on.

It makes me wonder why that phrase begin in this context in the first place. it may have been a mechanic or a shop owner who bribes the maître d’ to get a good table at a restaurant and promise him or her to grease the wheels for free in exchange.

Or it might just be a metaphor although I have yet to figure out what a meta is. Perhaps it just means that the bribe will get the wheels moving faster and you can zip up to the front of the line. Frankly, politicians know exactly what this means. I can hear them now, “it wasn’t a bribe it was just grease.” I think I’m going to try it at the DMV the next time I have to go there. I bet you it will work. Either that or I will be arrested for bribing a state employee.

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