Next year, I’ve decided I am going to be an Olympic champion. I don’t even know if the Olympics are next year or not but that is beside the point. In my mind they are next year and I’m going to win. Perhaps making the most grunts while getting up from my recliner. Hey, the grunting thing worked for Monica Seles in tennis, so why not me?
I will proudly display my gold medal in a shadow box in the living room. The medal it’s self will be filled with chocolate because that’s the only kind of gold medal I can afford. I’m not stupid, I know that I can’t get grunting in the Olympics So I will have buy my own Gold medal. all though since curling exists in the Olympics, why not grunting?
I can grunt with the best of them. It usually takes me at least a couple of grunts to get out of the recliner, the dinner table, the bathtub, walking up the stairs, getting out of bed, and getting up off the floor? Forget about it. Oh I forgot getting out of the car. That’s one of the worst. There are probably better grunters out there, but they’re not invited to participate in my Olympic game. I need to win!
Thank you for paying attention and reading this blog all the way through. I just read it myself but I am heavily sedated right now but who knows? It could happen. Maybe I could even get some sponsors, like BenGay or icy hot. Now I just have to work out a contract with NBC. I will let you know when it all happens and you can watch it on TV.