There’s a place in our town called the pie pizzeria and I always order chipotle ranch sauce instead of marinara, mozzarella and smothered in bacon. I’m having a quadruple bypass today.
OK, obviously I’m not having surgery today. It’s tomorrow. I’m just kidding I’m not having any kind of surgery. But if I was, it would be totally worth it. Yes finally and figuratively I have found the pizza to die for.
I know what you’re thinking. There is no food in the world that is so good that you would put so much on the line just to eat it. Well, that’s exactly how good this bacon pizza is. I can’t eat any other pizza now. I am ruined for life. I know this stuff will probably do me in, but I don’t care. I’m like Jon Bon Jovi. I’m going out in a blaze of pizza.
Based on what I’ve seen and heard, heart attacks hurt pretty bad. But having never experienced one I really don’t know how bad it is bad. I’m willing to roll the dice. The next time you order a pizza do a special order with the chipotle ranch, mozzarella and tons of bacon. If you survive, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. Best of luck.