In Search Of The Impossible!!!

The ‘Impossible Burger’ is amazing, or so I’m told. It’s a burger made in a sterile environment in a (gasp) lab! So why am I so curious? Because I can’t eat red meat anymore. If I can’t find the crazy things, I’ll have to wait until the real burgers change color. You know, like cheese.

According to Wikipedia, “To produce heme protein from non animal sources, Impossible Foods selected the leghemoglobin molecule found naturally in the roots of soy plants. … To replicate the fat in hamburgers made from cows, Impossible Foods used flecks of coconut fat, which were mixed with ground textured wheat and potatoes.

Mmm, sounds yummy. I’m kidding, of course. It sounds disgusting, but the company says the look, color, texture and taste is just like a really good burger. We’ll see about that just as soon as I can find it. They’re harder to find than Easter Eggs my father hid when he was drunk. One year, he hid little airline bottles of booze instead of eggs. That was an interesting holiday.

I’m told that Red Robin restaurants have them. I’ll find out and let you know either 1) if they’re everything the company claims they are, or 2) which hospital I’m in from eating green ground beef at home. Stay tuned…

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