I sometimes pretend I believe in reincarnation. Please, no offense to those who do. I only use it if I’m sensing a fight is in the works. I don’t fight, so the best I can do is tell them, “You just wait! When I die, I’m coming back as Bruce Willis. Then you’ll pay!”
I check the analytics on this blog daily, and have discovered that my largest readership base is in – wait for it – India! I love it! It is very gratifying to see that number grow! I’m very happy it’s not China for a couple of reasons. First, I would absolutely believe they are trying to hack my network. Plus, I would have to go there and negotiate a tariff.
I’m also happy it’s not the Soviet Union. They would only be hacking for one reason. To influence my possible election as the Elks Club President at the lodge down the street. I’ve already heard the whispers. Plus, I’m running against Hillary! I know! Not the famous one. It’s Hillary Rodman Farquar. Wish me luck!
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Another set of classic Jerry one-liners!
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