No Substitutions!!!

I was talking to Heather about the tariffs on Chinese products last night. When I was finished, her only response was, “Does this mean we’ll have to pay more for Chinese food?” She’s just a tad sarcastic.

Ordering Chinese food for delivery is tricky business. One small mistake and you will have spent 40 bucks on something that resembles Chun King ‘Chinese food’ from the grocery store and that’s just gross. My Mom loved the stuff. To me, it’s the equivalent of liver and onions. Again, gross.

When we order Chinese delivery, we have to be very careful to enunciate because our information exchange is poor, at best. Once, I ordered ham fried rice. They brought me a ham on rye sandwich. I know! They don’t even serve sandwiches so I don’t ever want to know how they got it. It was a little heavy on the mayo, but delicious just the same.

We always order from the same restaurant. That’s also a good way to reduce errors. Familiarity with the menu is important. We get the same thing every time. Sweet and sour chicken (I don’t know how they do both at the same time), chicken lo mein, two egg rolls and some wontons.

I decided to try a different place with the same exact order once. It was unrecognizable. We had to call in a forensic team to determine if it was actually food. After a pretty good scolding from Heather for messing things up, I ordered from our regular place. Chinese food cost us $80 that night but it was worth it to learn the ironic lesson – no substitutions!!!

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One thought on “No Substitutions!!!

  1. I doubt if I would get far, my first question (if I was in the USA) would be ‘Do you do that with fries?’

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