It’s The Psychic’s Fault!!!

I finally broke down and went to a psychic. She held my hands and said, “I see a lot of money in your future. And a very big house.” I was astonished! I asked her if she could tell me when this would happen. She said, “That all depends on when you get caught for robbing the bank and go to prison.”

I know there are people who really believe in psychics and fortune tellers. Some go once in a while if they have a big decision to make. Others go nearly every day because they lack the patience to wait and see what unfolds in their life. Still others like to try to talk to dead people or pets.

Frankly, I’m really a skeptic. First, the ‘Psychic Network’ went bankrupt in the 80’s. How could that possibly happen? I know! Then the TV ‘Pet Psychic’ was called out and was proven to be a fraud. She had staff members planted in the line where they choose the audience members to participate on the show.

The ‘plants’ would ask a person next to them a lot of questions about their pet who had passed, and those unsuspecting people would be shocked and amazed by the fake psychic. I think I’ll do a show like that but specifically for goldfish that have been flushed down the toilet. My response would always be the same. “He says he’s pissed and is going to get even.” It would be funny seeing people totally freaked out because they’re afraid of a goldfish’s revenge. I’m really going to do it.

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