What Do You Mean You Don’t Have It?????

Why are they called ‘convenience stores’? They don’t sell everything you need. That’s not very convenient. Yesterday I wanted to get some wicker patio furniture because we were going to have a fire on the patio. It was 1 am so I went to 7-11. They had nothing! I know! I’m writing a letter.

In retrospect, I guess I could have gone to Walmart, but it’s a lot further from home and therefore not nearly as convenient as the gas station and store right on the corner. I shouldn’t have to be subjected to the people at Walmart when I’m looking for something sensible like wicker furniture at 1 am.

It’s really ridiculous. Stores can be very crafty to lure you in. I once went to Subway and asked to buy a token to go to the city. They just kept asking “6 inch or foot long?” It’s like They didn’t even know what I was talking about.

I don’t know if you have a “Jimmy Johns’ sandwich shop near you, but if you do you know they have a neon sign that reads ‘FREE SMELLS’. So imagine my surprise when they had me arrested because I began going to tables smelling the food and ladies hair! I know! When I get outta here I’m going to sue that place.

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