You’re How Old????

A friend of mine just married a 27 year old beautiful woman. He’s 60 so I asked him, “How in the world did you land such a beautiful young woman?” He said, “Jerry, I’m not proud of it but I lied about a couple of things. I told her I was rich and 87.”

Gold diggers come in every shape and size. Many years ago a guy I knew always drove a beautiful new car, had really nice clothing and lots of cash. One day I asked him what he did for a living. He told me that he lived with an elderly rich woman. “She gives me everything I want.”

I was disgusted. Pure gold digging. He said he inherited a lot of property and money and then moved on to the next one. He suggested I do the same. I know! I did it. It was awesome! I’m just kidding, it was actually quite awkward. Just kidding!

I don’t understand moochers. Doesn’t it feel better to make your own money with a sense of accomplishment? I think so. Heather always jokes about having an affair. I always tell her it’s ok as long as the guy has money and is willing to share. We have a great laugh and then I go home to my rich, elderly mistress.

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