I Can’t Believe You Would Do That!!!

I can’t believe you think I would do something like that! – said every liar and cheater ever.

The obnoxious phrase, ‘Methinks thou doth protest too much’ deserves a throat punch to the speaker within two seconds after the words are uttered. Still, there is something that rings true in all of its irritating narrative.

I think we’ve learned from most politicians that this is true. Deny everything, at all costs. Plead the fifth. Fight until the legal system takes you down, then claim you have a drinking or prescription medications problem and need help. Many times that kind of junk will get you off the hook and even get people to root for your return.

It also works for entertainers several times in their career. Not all, of course, just the ones who flirt with disastrous behavior until they get caught. Rehab and then back to the fame, fortune and bad behavior until they’re caught again. Then it’s ‘rinse, lather and repeat’.

I think I’m going to try that. Not with hard drugs or alcohol. Maybe I’ll start snoring Midol. When I get caught I’ll defend myself by saying it’s not my fault because I’m going through the worst period of my life.

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