Get Out Of My Way!!!!

A recent (real) study found that the average American utters their first curse word of the day at 10:54 a.m. I know! Bull!! The average person is stuck in traffic long before that so it can’t possibly be true.

I think most everyone hates a traffic jam. I think ‘Criminal Minds’ profilers have it all wrong. They’re always looking for the trigger that causes the unsub to start whackin’ people. Look no further. It is obviously being stuck in traffic.

I’ve heard motivational speakers say that being caught in traffic is a perfect time to learn a new language. I think it’s true although I think you’d get thrown out of most places using the words in your new ‘language’. Others say it’s a great time to listen to an audio book. This is a bad idea. Most people like suspense novels and I don’t need to push myself closer to the edge of violence.

I have an idea… Widen the freeways! Stagger work schedules, which worked perfectly during the 1984 Olympic Games in Los Angeles. But as soon as the games were over the employers went back to normal shifts and we went back to gridlock. Ridiculous. I’m happy to report that I no longer have road rage because I no longer drive. But my wife? This sweet lady curses like a sailor when the rubber meets the road. I say nothing, of course.

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3 thoughts on “Get Out Of My Way!!!!

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