You’re A Jerk!!!

I went to see my doctor because I had a sore throat. He asked what was wrong but I could barely talk. He demanded that I speak louder. I said, “I’m sorry, I’m a little hoarse.” He said, “Sorry to be the one to break it to you but the resemblance doesn’t stop there.”

The nerve of some people. I know! A couple of years ago I discovered that I am allergic to shellfish. We were having an crab appetizer at home when suddenly, bam – my throat started closing up, my heart was very erratic, you know the symptoms.

Instead of going to the ER like a sane person, I decided to take benadryl and try to relax. I could breathe but my heart wasn’t getting better. I went to see my (now former) doctor. I explained to the receptionist what was happening and she told me that I was in anaphylaxis and needed to see the doctor immediately.

I stood right there for half an hour (I know!) while she checked with their accounting department to make sure I didn’t owe them any money! I didn’t. I complained to the doctor about it and he said she was just doing her job. I couldn’t believe it. I never have to wait now because I put some fake blood on my ears, nose and throat before going in.

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3 thoughts on “You’re A Jerk!!!

  1. Milk shake froth around the lips might help too?
    Reminds me of a Brant Parker/Johnny Hart cartoon from the ‘Wizard of Id’ series.
    A peasant goes into the doctors an unsympathetic sharp faced nurse is there. He says ‘I have a pain’
    She replies, unhelpfully:
    ‘Sir everyone has a pain. The doctor has a pain. I have a pain. My husband has a pain’
    The peasant replies
    ‘Let me guess where your husband’s is,’

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s the state of healthcare today. My sister went to the hospital with a bad post-partum infection and she was made to wait nearly 10 hours. Long story short, she needed an operation because the last hospital messed up her first c-section and she has been living with an attached wound vacuum for this infection for the last month. I told her she should get a lawyer.

    Liked by 1 person

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