I think watching Hoarders has had an adverse effect on me. I’m so ashamed, but I’ve become one. I hoard air, and lots of it. My house is full of it. I can’t walk in any room where it’s not packed from floor to ceiling. I need help.
I think I started ‘collecting’ air when I moved out of my parents house. They also hoarded air. Their house was filled with it as far back as I can remember. They never sought help and even though I’m an adult who makes the decisions my wife dictates, I still blame them.
Like most hoarders, most of the time I don’t even notice it. I have cold air in the summer, warm air when it’s cold, outside air in the Spring. It’s bad. I even bought some canned air for the computer. It’s gotten so bad that air has spilled out of the house and now the yard is completely full too. So is the car.
I’m afraid that if I can’t get it under control, we’ll be evicted and have to live in the streets. I know I need to to figure out what air to keep and what air to get rid of, but I think I really need some help. My neighbors are air hoarders too but they are worse than me. The both pay to have oxygen tanks brought in. I know!
Something has to change or Heather says she’s going to leave me. Help me, Dr. Zasio!