Yesterday I saw a mall cop with a real gun! I know! That’s what we need. More Paul Blarts running around armed and really wanting to get their first collar. I don’t think I’ll yell “Wannabe” at them anymore. #mallshopperslivesmatter
Seriously, I actually saw that. Do people think this is a good thing? I think it makes me love Amazon a lot more. There’s no one armed with a deadly firearm during the entire purchase and delivery process. I kind of like that.
At least I think that’s the case. The person who fills my order might have a concealed weapon and I will never know it, so it’s ok. Wait! I just thought of a problem. That person has access to my home address. Yikes!
Ok, I need to settle down. There’s no proof that the Amazon dude is carrying a gun. Breathe. I’m feeling better now. But there’s still the threat of the needs from school who became mall security guards to finally have some power over people and are now packing heat! It’s a good thing in seeing my shrink today.
Seems a reasonable line of thought to me Jerry, a minimum wage armed man…..ooooohhh.
Good old fashion water pistols, that’s the answer.
Either that or custard pies.
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Just like the good old days, yeah?
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It’s a nice crazy image of a cop cornering a robber.
‘Come out or I’ll squirt you really good!’
‘Ya wouldn’t dare, I’ll squirt ya back!’
‘I will too!!’
‘Yeh, well I gotta cream pie here!’
Yeh? Well don’t make me use my tub of melting pistachio ice cream!!’
In the words of the old Beach Boys song ‘Wouldn’t It Be Nice’
Seasons greeting Jerry.
Roger
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Ha! The same to you, Roger!
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