Hummingbird Gangsters!!!

I think if I were a hummingbird I would become a thief. I could move so quickly that no one could catch me. If I were stealing alone, I would take only trinkets off of porches. What else could I carry? I'm a hummingbird!

Thats how I would begin my life of crime. I would need to increase my habit over time to large objects. For those capers I would need to recruit help. Start taking chairs to lounge with in the trees. We would obviously take the feeders that nearly everyone has set out to feed us.

Not suspecting us, they would be replaced. Beautiful. I don't do drugs. I'm already hyped up enough. I grab a cold one at night to calm down. I tried ambien but I kept falling out of the tree. That's where the chairs come in really handy. After a few years of procreation I wouldn't need to recruit any more. The kids could join the family business.

We would have to watch out for dangerous rival gangs like the Ravens, the Buzzards and the Crows. They would all hate us because we're so stinking cute. After reading what I've written today, I think I'm going to start bolting every thing down outside. Including the hummingbird feeder. No one can be trusted.

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5 thoughts on “Hummingbird Gangsters!!!

  1. Cool! “The Hummingbird” would make a cool villain name for a Superhero comic. He or She has the powers to move super fast in spurts (A little different than the Flash) and vibrations he sets off can shake things out of place and break locks. He/She also built a contraption that mimics a Hummingbird’s wings and uses it to fly and escape.

    Liked by 1 person

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