I Wasn’t Checking Her Out!!! 

“On my honor, I wasn’t checking her out!” That’s something a lot of men could say to get out of hot water. But Bill Clinton? I don’t think so. And at the Inauguration? Not smart. Talk about poking a hornets nest. 


Most men have subtle ways of checking out a lady when they’re out with their wife. I say they have subtle ways; I didn’t say they work. The wife always knows. Always. She might not say anything, but you’re certainly in the doghouse and one step closer to losing her. 

So, some guys don’t even try to hide it. They say stupid things like an acquaintance of mine. “Just because we’re married doesn’t mean I can’t look at the menu.” Or, “I’m married, not blind.” Then these knuckleheads are surprised when their wife leaves them. Really?

Let me be clear. When you’re out with your lady, treat her like one. Checking out another woman when out with the love of your life is like a slap in the face to her. Never check out other women unless you know for certain that she’s not around. Anywhere. 

There’s a fine line between looking at a glance and ogling at someone. Everyone, including ladies, takes a little more than a glance when a stunning person walks by. If it goes beyond that, it’s wrong and you’re busted. You might even try saying, “I was just thinking about how much prettier that outfit would look on you.” Busted. She knows what you’re up to. 

There are always prettier women or more handsome men out there, but if you really love your significant other, stop staring at other people right in front of them. I used to date a model. We were on a dinner date when she excused herself to use the restroom. A guy asked me if we were married. I said no, and when she came back to the table the same guy asked her out – right in front of me!

Before I could get up to throat punch the guy, she said, “What makes you think that I would EVER go out with someone like you? You’re disgusting and I’m out with a ‘real’ man that I love, so get lost.” Perfect. We broke up a couple of weeks later, she married the guy and they have two beautiful children. I guess it didn’t work. Never mind. 

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Facebook: Jerry Mabbott
Twitter: @jmabbott

2 thoughts on “I Wasn’t Checking Her Out!!! 

  1. So you’re out in public; by yourself and this attractive woman steps into your line of vision, and then they open their mouth:
    “So…y’know…well…heeeheeheeeheeee! Oh MY GOD! I said…..heeeeheeeeheeeee!”
    ” And I said to him f**** you! I’m f****ing fed up of him and his sh**! F***er!!”
    And then I personally thank God for sending my darling wife my way.

    Liked by 1 person

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