Somebody Make It Stop!!!

My wife sings while doing something fun. I told her that I think she should be on the radio. She said, “That’s so sweet! You like my singing? I said, “Well, not exactly. It’s just that I could change the channel or turn the thing off”.

Now before you get angry with me, let me say that Heather has a wonderful singing voice. Not everyone does. Obviously, there are many people who are really bad at self awareness. We saw it for years on “American Idol”.

Half of the fun of the show was watching dreadful singers perform before the judges and how they reacted to the panel when they told the contestant that they just didn’t have the talent. I can picture Simon Cowell saying, “If I’m going to be honest, if you continue to make this dreadful noise, you should be arrested and sent to Sing Sing prison in New York.

In fact, that’s where the worst contestants were sent after their horrid audition. The good ones got a golden card and were off to Hollywood, while the wicked ones were handcuffed and taken directly to the famous prison, which still houses about 2,000 inmates.

In fact, since the prison is north of New York City and on the Hudson River, it’s where the term, “Up the river” came from. The inmate contestants are allowed to leave so long as they agree to never again sing, even in the shower at home or if any windows are open. Otherwise, back up the river.

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