Stay Home!!

A friend of mine was out camping for three days and didn’t tell his wife. She was pretty ticked off when he came home on Sunday night. She said, “How would you like it if you couldn’t see me for three days”? Sure enough, He didn’t see her again until Thursday, when the swelling went down in his eyes.


When I lived in Southern California, I dated a beautiful woman who’s parents were rich. It was fun and things were going well. Then one day, she disappeared. No phone calls, not even a little note.


I drove to her place and her beautiful black Corvette was still parked in front of her house. Thinking the worst, I used my key and thought for sure I would find her body. But thankfully that was not the case. Everything looked in tact.


I filed a missing persons report, checked all of the hospitals and hotels in the area, but turned up nothing. I think I even held a candlelight vigil for her and put up posters everywhere. I left a billion messages on her cell phone voice mail.


Nothing worked. I didn’t have her parents information and they lived somewhere in The San Francisco Bay Area. Since that’s all I knew, the police found their information and got in touch with the maid. She said that she had no idea where the wife was and the husband was out of town on a business trip.


This was crazy. It was kind of fun driving her Corvette around, but still… Since the police didn’t suspect foul play, (personally, I never expected a chicken was involved), so I went about my business. After two weeks, I got a call from her, letting me know that she was home.


I said, “Where in the heck were you”??? She said she was in Europe with her mother. Europe??? Seriously?? I asked her why she didn’t call or leave a note out maybe tell me on, oh I don’t know, our date the night before???


She said it was a spur of the moment thing and that if we were going to be together I would have to get used to it because this was common for them. I gave her the car and house keys that night and never saw her again. Crazy.

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