Jerry Mabbott's Blog

I potty trained my kids to go in the neighbor’s house.

When my kids were little and my cooking skills consisted of opening a wrapper, we dined at Mickey-D’s a lot. Quick, easy, inexpensive and happy kids. Who knew that we were also destroying their health?

When we would arrive at McDonald’s, the kids’ job was to find a table. The place was always packed. Jam packed. I would wait in line to order some happy meals and a combo of some sort for myself. 

One night, as I was getting fairly close to the front of a very long line, Eric told me he had to go to the bathroom. Yikes! I didn’t dare leave the line or I’d end up spending another 45 minutes waiting to order. So I pointed out the bathroom and asked Sarah, 3 years older than Eric, to stand by the door until he came out.

I forgot that when kids are being potty trained, they feel the need to remove all of their clothing. Everything. Just as I landed in the “You’re next” spot in line, here comes my son, crying and holding his finger which he had hurt somehow. He was also stark naked. I know!

As I saw it, I had two choices: 1) I could pick him up and hold him and order, or 2) take him back to the bathroom, get him dressed and start at the back of the line again. I chose to hold him and order. A woman in the line to my left said,”That’s disgusting. Where is his mother??” I looked her dead in the eye and said, “She’s in the flower bed. Anymore questions?” 

So, we ordered, I took Eric and got him dressed and washed up. We then enjoyed or dinner, all the while being stared at by the woman who no doubt thought I was a serial killer. Heh, heh, heh.