I’ve Still Got It!!

Yesterday, a hot girl gave me her phone number without me even asking for it. Ok, I hit her car, but still…

Everyone seems to have a different perspective on what constitutes cheating. There is a physical affair that we can all agree on, but there are other behaviors that people think are cheating. 


There’s the emotional cheat. That’s when a person confides details of their lives that the spouse thinks should be discussed only at home, and with them. There is the cyber cheat. 


People sign up for dating sites and meet someone to communicate with through the Internet. 
There’s the fabricated cheat, where one spouse suspects there is something going on, but in reality there is nothing happening. All of these cheats can and oftentimes lead to divorce. 


I heard a new one on TV this week that really made me laugh. It’s called television cheating. Suppose you and your spouse have a TV show you like to watch together, but one partner watches it without the other. They were claiming it’s cheating if you don’t tell the other person you watched it. 


I know! How crazy is that? I am then guilty of cheating. That’s just nuts. What’s next, you get a card in the mail, addressed to you both, but you decide to open it when your spouse isn’t there. Oh my goodness, you’ve cheated! If you go to the grocery store to pick up some items and you buy a snack on the way home without telling your spouse. You creep! You cheated. 


Once, when I was in Atlanta for a week, I went down to the lounge every night, because I didn’t want to sit in my room by myself every night. The hotel was remodeling the lounge, so I was the only patron all night. On Friday night, a male member of the band said that they had not seen the city because they were performing all week, and asked me to go with them. 
It sounded like fun, so I went. We got back about 8 am, having hit many hot spots and then Dennys for breakfast. We all talked for a long time about being in a band and traveling all over the place, hoping to be discovered. 


My  girlfriend called just after I got back to the room and demanded to know where I had been. I told her the truth. She broke up with me on the spot. She assumed the worst. I told her that if I was going to lie to her, I could certainly come up with a better story than the truth. I guess I should have lied. 


In her mind, I cheated. I could see her being angry for a few days, but she obviously didn’t trust me. All for the best, I guess. I doubt I would have ever done comedy or meet my wonderful wife, Heather. Life is very good!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think there’s an episode of NCIS, our favorite show, on in a few minutes. I’m going to watch it alone. Horrible. 

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6 thoughts on “I’ve Still Got It!!

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