Cash or Charge??

I think it would have been funny if Johnny Cash and Eddie Money would have done a show together. It would have been Cash Money.

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I’m a fan of both of those guys, but especially Johnny Cash. I remember when he came to the prison I was in and performed for us. It was an awesome concert. Wait.. That wasn’t me. I was in a different prison. Wait.. I’ve never even been arrested. I must have listened to the cd.

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I’ve never really been a fan of Eddie Money, but I did like the episode of “King of Queens” where Doug and Deacon won five grand and tried to spend it all in one day. They just couldn’t spend the money fast enough and finally hired Eddie Money to do a concert in Doug’s living room.

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So, what would I do if I had five large to spend in one day? I would be tempted to put it money market accounts or play the stock market. The problem with that is that Heather would find out somehow. She always does. I truly believe that women possess super powers.

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I used to get gas at my favorite convenience store because they had great hotdogs. So, I’d get my gas and always a couple of delicious hotdogs to eat on the way home. Then one day she asked me to go get some gas, and said, “And don’t get any hotdogs.” I was very afraid of her after that and I’ve never bought one when I was alone again.

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I think God gave them the special powers to help keep their men alive. Let’s face it, if I was still single, I would buy junk food like that everyday. That used to be my way of grocery shopping. It’s not just me, either. The next time you are at a convenience store, check out the married men. They all come out with food. Why? Because their wives make them eat healthy crap.

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I remember going to a restaurant that had the best patty melts I had ever tasted. One of my friends ratted me out to Heather. She banned from eating anything unhealthy at this particular restaurant. One day, my friends and I were at the restaurant and I ordered the patty melt.

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I failed to notice Heather having lunch with a girlfriend at a booth just a few booths away from us. I would have gotten away with it, too, but my friends started laughing so loud, it drew her attention our way. So, she came over. She was mad. Really mad. I never ate there without her again.

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I’m telling you, super powers.

See you tomorrow.

Connect with me on:
Facebook: Jerry Mabbott
Twitter: @jmabbott
Web: jerrymabbott.com

See you tomorrow! Jerry


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