I think I’m going to start a new gang. I’ll call it The Blips, a cross between the bloods and crips. We’ll have leather jackets, fake tattoos because the real ones hurt, and do drive by attacks throwing baloney sandwiches. Oh and when confronted with a violent gang, we’ll all play dead. My street name … More Gangland!!!

Instead of bombing Syria, I think we should bomb Syrup companies who sell sugar free syrup. Clearly ISIS is behind this. I know it’s great for people with diabetes, but man, for the rest of us, full blown Aunt Jamima is the best! Some things that are fat free can be really good. Cheese slices … More